just one of those..........

being so lonely in the crowds
how it feels to know you r alone
when you know a lot of people around you
when you are there in everyones celeberations
and to know you are not improtant to any one of them
that you are never admired for your own presence
that you are just one more count in the group
not for one, not for two, but for everyone
to know that you are just one of those lots many flowers
in the gardens of roses and lillies
and spectacular when so many around
not even one would take you preciously
you are just one of those roads that people pass by
that they know they have passed, then passed and forgotten
you are one of those birds who fly in flocks
not even one is precious to those who see them
but yes, all of them look together really cute
it hurts to know insignificance of your precense
to know that nobody is really looking for you
whatever you do, however you are
you are just one of those many things that happen to one
to just happen, and not rememberd
to just pass by, and never gathered!!!

Tonight the stars are bright
And it is the loveliest night
All smiles are genuine
And all twinkles are shining

Tonight the stars are bright
And heart is pounding high
All the worlds’ happiness is in me
And all the flowers are smelling good

Tonight the stars are bright
And love flows from all sides
All the colours look beautiful
And grass even more cold and moist

Tonight the stars are bright
And shivers are true
All gods are blessing me
And clouds are thundering

Tonight the stars are bright
And it is the perfect night
All the love is true
And I am happy, though late, it’s so nice.

ME AND SADNESS

I don’t know why
But this is what I see
That whenever I am happy
Sadness will follow me
Without a reason without a notice
So abruptly, and so easily
Giving pains and tears to shed
And then it stays with me, longer than anything else
As it is the only true companion I have
And I dislike it so much, still it keeps coming back
With same bad intense depressions
It makes me stay like this for long
But I was not like this forever
But who can now accept me as I am
Deceived, disdained, depressed, alone
That I am little afraid
That I am the one who doubts everything
That I am aloof all the time
That may be I like to be in sadness
And so even more leave me alone
With my forever companion
For they can’t bear the atrocious I say
And I am insulted and thrown out
Out of life, theirs and mine
And I stay looking back
So helpless that I can’t even say a word
Still trying to get back to joy
And shoved out of ways again and again
Then here I am
Again wording my grief
Again trying to overcome my sorrow
Again being lonely between everybody
Again scared, again dreaming
Again expecting, again crying
What will I be now? I don’t know
But this is what I see
That “sadness” is again with me.

Hold me tight as I am so scared
Pat me right as I am trembling
Kiss me please coz I am breaking down
Love me all, coz I am so alone
Make me laugh, as I can’t do it from heart
Make me cry coz I really want to do it loud
But my tears have dried
Make me love, coz I have forgotten this sheer joy
Hush me please when you have listened to all I have to say
Tell me then that you still love me the same way
Know me all, and love me even more
Ask me if I can trust you on that
Take me back to my life which I have left
Pull me to you coz I want you the most today
Coz I love only you, I yearn only you!!

Like I am in a closet
The heart is tight locked
Just feeling inside
If I also had something to be happy about
Something of that sort
That everybody has
That even I could feel happiness in my heart
And happier, happiest forever
To feel what love is
What it is to trust someone I love
But, that’s so distant a feeling
When the whole world has betrayed
When all are looking down
To have a chance to break into pieces
One moment of sheer joy
Brings even more of fears
Of being alone all over again
Of being locked and the key lost.

nothing but a dream

drowned in my own fantasies

so overwhelmed with my dreams

i saw the peak of my happiness

which i was searching for, everywhere.

a sudden thought given to mind

told me its just inside

that i need to hold on and not run too fast

that i should just see the good, and forget my past.

when i woke up from the beauty of life

then only i realised

my dream was just a dream

that my past is never gonna leave

yes my happiness is within me

but i am so dead, i cant see myself smiling

for that happend once

which was dreadful as to make me dead

the one minute joy for someone

had made my life a living hell

i cant live, i cant smile, i cant love

it keeps coming back to me

and i realise that hapiness as far from me

that dreams will never come true

that i will always yearn in my heart

to have someone to love me

to be as i was once

and i relise even more

that dream will never come true

that happiness which i was feeling right now

was nothing but a dream!!!

best thing i could have had

those were the times when i was alone
struggling for the time to fly away
because of the unbearable pains and agony
that time was hurting and pinching
for someone who was so close
who was so dear, was the one whom i had started hating
and i realised its not even easy to hate
it takes an effort to hate the one you love
when he insults you, ignore you...
and so much that you start hating him.
and those were the times when i was blue
when my shoulders seemed so week
when eyes couldn't see so far away to happiness
when my lips couldn't move to speak out and shout
when my heart was not the same courageous
and my hands trembled to even shake hands
and trust was all torn like pieces of paper
those were the times when i needed you
and i know now that i needed you only
for you are the one who gave a new meaning to life
not by giving strength to face all that
but just being with me and forgetting all that
giving me all i wanted at that time
and making me realise that the world is not bad
and taking my hand to love
a true love with no bounding no selfishness
and i realised that dark days are not long enough
a new beginning can make you forget the past darkness
not forever, but dimming the memories
and letting you go ahead with life
and you are that new beginning in my life
and i cannot thank you for it
the word is so small for what you have done
all i can say is that it was the best thing i could have had.